Marriage Roles Christ-Church-Husbands-Wives
"Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as is fit in the Lord." Ephesians 5:22 6-9 Marriage has been disparaged in our society and it continues to be. Many claim marriage is no longer a viable institution in today's society. Statistics show that half of all marriages end in divorce. Yet, people still get married! People get married, because marriage fulfills a need in our lives. We have a need for companionship. God said that it was not good that man should be alone, and so He created a woman for the man. God instituted marriage. He performed the first wedding ceremony. "The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib, He took from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said, 'This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.' For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh." Genesis 2:22-24. "Then the Pharisees came to Him and tempted Him, saying to Him, 'Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause?' But He answered them, saying, 'Have you not read that He Who made them from the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh'? So then, they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate.' " (from Matthew 19:3-6). Marriage is a divine institution. Not something society invented, therefore, society cannot define it. God defined marriage as the joining of a man and a woman for a life time. God invented marriage and He gave us instructions for it. We are warned in Amos 3:3 "Can two walk together unless they be agreed?" The problem usually is we are not willing to take His advice. Instead of doing things God's way, we do things our way. "and be subject to one another in the fear" (awe, honor and respect) of Christ. Ephesians 5:21-22 through Eph. 6:9. Submission is a result of a HOLY SPIRIT controlled life, The apostle Paul explains how it works in the family. Scripture also dictates "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and lawlessness have in common? And what fellowship does light have with darkness? And what union does Christ have with Belial? Or what part does a believer have with an unbeliever? And what agreement is there between a temple of God and idols? For you are a temple of the living God, exactly as God said: 'I will dwell in them and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be My people. Therefore, come out from the midst of them and be separate,' says the Lord, 'and touch not the unclean, and I will receive you; And I shall be a Father to you, and you shall be My sons and daughters,' says the Lord Almighty." (2 Corinthians 6:14-18). Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as unto the Lord. Ephesians 5:22 As her husband submits to the Lord (thereby leading and guiding his wife and family in action and deed by his submission to God's laws and God's will). If a husband is NOT submitting to God's will, teachings and laws; then the wife does not go along with her husband's rebellious, destructive ungodly worldly ways. She must FIRST Submit to God's laws which are above her husbands rulings. Example; If a husband wishes his wife to drive a get away car in a bank robbery; she as a Godly woman does not submit to this evil behavior of breaking God's laws. Nor would she agree to prostitute her body nor agree to do anything God despises, hates, and commands us to not do. Again we see this in Colossians; "Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Colossians 3:18 Godly wives, "willingly place themselves and their children under their husband's, authority." As LONG as her husband is submitting (willingly putting) himself in turn under God's laws, as a true believer! Not an unbeliever, in which case the couple are considered "Unequally yoked." One or the other spouse at some point of time after their marriage, found God and His laws. Or they went against God ordained and inspired scripture that tells Believers to NOT marry outside their basic belief and the teachings of God's word. Specifically both must obey His Ten Commandments in Exodus 20 and Summarized by Christ in Matthew 22:37-40. "Submission is of a wife's willing voluntary attitude based on one's recognition of God's ordained order, it cannot be forced upon her against her will by a demanding despot." Despot means: 1. a ruler who has total power and who often uses that power in cruel and unfair ways. 2. exercising power tyrannically: a person exercising absolute power in a brutal or oppressive way that is unethical and immoral and against that of reasonable laws of God and men. (Source Merriam's dictionary,) A wife submits to her "own" husband, as opposed to men in general. God said that when couples marry, the interference of well meaning parents, other relatives, employer or friends or anyone that is attempting to get between a man and his wife is wrong. She is to listen to her Husband with the exception of first obeying God and His laws, then her husband... -if such instruction is Godly. (Matt. 19:6 and Mark 10:9) The New Testament commands the wife to be subject to her husband, But never commands the husband to be subject to his wife. Submission lines up under authority of God and Christ which her husband submits to and in turn lovingly asks her to submit to him for their life, marriage, and family This involves respect, obedience, and forsaking all others; thus not allowing others to intrude in the marital home structure. Ephesians 5:33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. 1 Peter 3:5-7: There was respect and love from the wife for her husband and a husband who was not harsh or demanding or overbearing. Paul says that the wife is to be subject to her own husband "as to the Lord." Eph. 6:7; Col. 2:23 refers to Christ and not to man, The same applies to Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Colossians 3:18. The reason why wives are to submit to their husband is because Christ is our savior and it honors Christ not because your husband is such a wonderful guy, or because he deserves it. Sometimes a husband does not deserve anything from you! If your husband is in turn Submitting to Christ!! NOTE: This only applies to converted baptized women who have accepted Christ as their savior and in baptism put to death the things that belong to their earthly, sinful self. As you love the Lord, you are willing to do whatever it is he asks you to do. A wife's love for Christ motivates her to submit in the same manner to her husband within reason. She looks in God's word and scripture. Applying biblical scripture plays a vital role in our obeying the Lord Christ. Ephesians 5:22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. John 14:21, "If you love Me, you will obey Me." A woman (wife) says, "Out of loving You, Lord, I am going to do what You have told me to do according to your laws." That is the motivation "as to the Lord." The New Testament elevated a God loving women to a position of honor, respect, and dignity. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. Ephesians 5:23 "And He put all things in subjection under His feet, and gave Him as head over all things to the church, which is His body, the fullness of Him who fills all in all." Ephesians 1:22-23 "...Christ is head over all things to the Church." The husband is the head of the wife, "But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every Man, and the man is the head of a Woman, and God is the head of Christ." 1 Corinthians 11:3. 1 Peter 3:7 "Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered." Men and women as marriage partners become equally divine, but there is a subordination of function; so too, man and woman are spiritually equal, but one ranks above the other in function. [In such a relationship both partners are pulling together towards a Godly Goal.] When Paul says to the wife, "submit to your own husbands as unto the Lord," he means submission, not inferiority. Women are not in anyway inferior to the man," But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything." Ephesians 5:24. A wife's submission is not a command that the husband can enforce. A husband should never use conniving, manipulation, brute force, mind-control, and other attempts to bring his wife into submission. Wifely submission is taught all through the Bible. "Let a woman quietly receive proper instruction with entire submissiveness. 12 But I do not allow a woman to teach (publicly correct/admonish) or exercise authority over a man, but to remain quiet." 1 Timothy 2:11-12. These verses give us the woman's role in the church. She is not to rule or overlord the men. "It was Adam who was first created, and then Eve. 14 And it was not Adam who was deceived, but the woman being quite deceived, fell into transgression." 1 Timothy 2:13-14. "For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; for indeed man was not created for the woman's sake, but woman for the man's sake." 1 Corinthians 11:8-9. [The roles in marriage were ordained by God at creation. Specific duties are flexible and can be worked out in a marriage for the mutual good of the couple. But the role of the husband as head and the wife is fixed. Creation places man in a position of authority over the woman. Eve was made for the sake of Adam, to be his helper:] "18 Then the LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.' 19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name. 20 And the man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. 21 So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh at that place. 22 And the LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. 23 And the man said, 'This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.' 24 For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh." Genesis 2:18-24. For a man ought not to have his head covered, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. 1 Corinthians 11:7-8 Both men and women were created in God's image, but as Paul points out in, the original creation from the "dust of the ground" was Adam only. Eve was created later from part of Adam. It was not Adam who was deceived, but the woman being quite deceived, fell into transgression. 1 Timothy 2:14 ADAM stood by and allowed his wife Eve to be deceived and was ultimately the one responsible for what happened to mankind. Romans 5:12-21 places the blame on Adam; he followed his wife. Men, God created us to be the leaders. When we fail to do this and follow our wives instead, it causes numerous problems. But she does have the responsibility to remind you when you are out of character from God's laws. Eve needed protection, she needed a head. She acted independently without consulting Adam and was deceived and fell. She was breaking all ten commandments and Adam was with her and did not stop her. Proverb 31:10-31 The submissive wife makes a choice to place herself as an equal underneath another equal, her husband, in order that there can be order and function in the family. If you want to have a properly functioning family, see Titus 2:1-15. It teaches us the role and conduct that God expects of both older and younger men and older and younger women. Scripture makes it clear it is normally the man's responsibility to lead, and the woman's responsibility is to submit. There were exceptions such as Deborah in the Bible, Phillips Daughters four Virgins who prophesied. Or at times when there is a young widow with children. In pseudo-Christian homes the woman is running the show and not submitting, she is leading. God has set male and female roles as defined in scripture for their good. When these roles are reversed, just like with Adam and Eve in their fall, it often results in the destruction of the man, and of the wife, as well as the entire family. This does not mean that a husband must make every decision, but he is responsible for every decision made. If a husband and wife disagree on a certain course of action, whose decision should be followed? It is the husband's ultimate decision right or wrong and God holds him accountable? The final ultimate decisions as to the finances, church, schooling of the children are up to the husband. Women, how do you respond when your husband makes a decision that you disagree with? Even when wrong you submit because God will direct and correct and it will come clear when a husband made a wrong decision in time. There needs to be respect and good open communication between a husband wife. If the wife is not clear she should ask for clarity, a rephrasing or a better understanding. A loving husband will take the time to communicate understanding. Many stresses and strains on family life today are precisely due to disagreeing or ignoring open communication with one another. HUSBANDS do need to hear objections and why, with reason and be willing to compromise or rethink a directive when it is valid to do so. The only times a woman does not submit to her husband is when it is in direct disobedience to God's laws and commandments. Then she take a stand to obey God first above her husband. [Common sense should dictate that a husband with mental illnesses should not be in control of the ruin of the family. For instance a husband who refuses to provide and uses drugs of various derivatives to escape responsibility and reality. 1 Timothy 5:8] Whether our culture agrees with Scripture or not—the clear teaching is that wives are to be subject to their own husbands in everything "AS IN THE LORD." What about the husband and an unbelieving or not yet converted wife. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it. A loving husband is gentle and takes his time showing his wife with love and patience and kindness leading his wife to the Lord and God's laws and teachings, He never forces it but leads her guides her. He teaches her, not as a bully or demanding or forcing. God does NOT force any of us to obey him whom He calls, He leaves the choice up to us to accept and submit and obey or to reject and walk away. But if the Husband is content to dwell, not contentious, and loving to her, then she submits to him as long as his directives are not contrary to any of God's laws and commandments. A husband or wife with an unconverted mate does all they can to help the unconverted mate to come to understand God and His laws. However if the unconverted continues to be bullheaded, divisive, disruptive, rebellious and contentious day in and day out, then you may have to let them go. You are NOT bound to them. You are free, and you set them free so you both can go on with the choices each has made. I Corinthians 7:10-16; Means the contentious husband or wife chose the world and repeatedly has refused to understand, submit to God's laws and makes excuses why they refuse to obey God and His laws. They blame and accuse and finding fault in others, but they are never wrong. Often these people have a Jezebel controlling spirit that is very deep and hard to overcome. Fighting such evil spirit takes a lot of divine prayer, fasting for days, meditation and anointing. Often even pastors and others of faith, unless very strong with the Holy Spirit, cannot drive it out; let alone a God loving wife or husband to such a person. If the unbelieving departs, you are allowed to re-marry. If there is NO hope at all of any re-conciliation you are not bound by marriage vows. For instance, the ex-spouse has married another and is polluted as an adulator. As true believers you are free to take a wife or husband of your own faith taking time to make sure you both have the same spiritual goals and not make another mistake. Many people of faith, not understanding scripture, feel they can never remarry. Every effort of reconciliation should be done however there comes a point you have spiritual insight and let the other depart and move on to whatever God directs you. 1 Tim. 5:11-15 admonishes younger widows to marry and bear children. Especially younger women with children should re-marry someone who is of like-minded and of the same faith. Deut. 6:14; Deut. 7:3-4 & 2 Corinthians 6:14. Admonish us not to go against God's laws and marry outside your faith, nearly always leading to problems. If believer has done this and the unconverted is content to accept the believer's commitment to God first good, A converted spouse is then the spiritual leader of the family and the children are made holy sanctified until they are of an age to choose God or the world.

Marriage Roles
Christ-Church-Husbands-Wives

"Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as is fit in the Lord." Ephesians 5:22 6-9

Marriage has been disparaged in our society and it continues to be. Many claim marriage is no longer a viable institution in today's society. Statistics show that half of all marriages end in divorce. Yet, people still get married! People get married, because marriage fulfills a need in our lives. We have a need for companionship. God said that it was not good that man should be alone, and so He created a woman for the man. God instituted marriage. He performed the first wedding ceremony. "The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib, He took from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said, 'This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.' For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh." Genesis 2:22-24. "Then the Pharisees came to Him and tempted Him, saying to Him, 'Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause?' But He answered them, saying, 'Have you not read that He Who made them from the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh'? So then, they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate.' " (from Matthew 19:3-6).

Marriage is a divine institution. Not something society invented, therefore, society cannot define it. God defined marriage as the joining of a man and a woman for a life time. God invented marriage and He gave us instructions for it. We are warned in Amos 3:3 "Can two walk together unless they be agreed?" The problem usually is we are not willing to take His advice. Instead of doing things God's way, we do things our way. "and be subject to one another in the fear" (awe, honor and respect) of Christ. Ephesians 5:21-22 through Eph. 6:9. Submission is a result of a HOLY SPIRIT controlled life, The apostle Paul explains how it works in the family. Scripture also dictates "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and lawlessness have in common? And what fellowship does light have with darkness? And what union does Christ have with Belial? Or what part does a believer have with an unbeliever? And what agreement is there between a temple of God and idols? For you are a temple of the living God, exactly as God said: 'I will dwell in them and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be My people. Therefore, come out from the midst of them and be separate,' says the Lord, 'and touch not the unclean, and I will receive you; And I shall be a Father to you, and you shall be My sons and daughters,' says the Lord Almighty." (2 Corinthians 6:14-18).

Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as unto the Lord. Ephesians 5:22 As her husband submits to the Lord (thereby leading and guiding his wife and family in action and deed by his submission to God's laws and God's will). If a husband is NOT submitting to God's will, teachings and laws; then the wife does not go along with her husband's rebellious, destructive ungodly worldly ways. She must FIRST Submit to God's laws which are above her husbands rulings. Example; If a husband wishes his wife to drive a get away car in a bank robbery; she as a Godly woman does not submit to this evil behavior of breaking God's laws. Nor would she agree to prostitute her body nor agree to do anything God despises, hates, and commands us to not do. Again we see this in Colossians; "Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Colossians 3:18

Godly wives, "willingly place themselves and their children under their husband's, authority." As LONG as her husband is submitting (willingly putting) himself in turn under God's laws, as a true believer! Not an unbeliever, in which case the couple are considered "Unequally yoked." One or the other spouse at some point of time after their marriage, found God and His laws. Or they went against God ordained and inspired scripture that tells Believers to NOT marry outside their basic belief and the teachings of God's word. Specifically both must obey His Ten Commandments in Exodus 20 and Summarized by Christ in Matthew 22:37-40.

"Submission is of a wife's willing voluntary attitude based on one's recognition of God's ordained order, it cannot be forced upon her against her will by a demanding despot." Despot means: 1. a ruler who has total power and who often uses that power in cruel and unfair ways. 2. exercising power tyrannically: a person exercising absolute power in a brutal or oppressive way that is unethical and immoral and against that of reasonable laws of God and men. (Source Merriam's dictionary,) A wife submits to her "own" husband, as opposed to men in general. God said that when couples marry, the interference of well meaning parents, other relatives, employer or friends or anyone that is attempting to get between a man and his wife is wrong. She is to listen to her Husband with the exception of first obeying God and His laws, then her husband... -if such instruction is Godly. (Matt. 19:6 and Mark 10:9)

The New Testament commands the wife to be subject to her husband, But never commands the husband to be subject to his wife. Submission lines up under authority of God and Christ which her husband submits to and in turn lovingly asks her to submit to him for their life, marriage, and family This involves respect, obedience, and forsaking all others; thus not allowing others to intrude in the marital home structure. Ephesians 5:33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. 1 Peter 3:5-7: There was respect and love from the wife for her husband and a husband who was not harsh or demanding or overbearing. Paul says that the wife is to be subject to her own husband "as to the Lord." Eph. 6:7; Col. 2:23 refers to Christ and not to man, The same applies to Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Colossians 3:18.

The reason why wives are to submit to their husband is because Christ is our savior and it honors Christ not because your husband is such a wonderful guy, or because he deserves it. Sometimes a husband does not deserve anything from you! If your husband is in turn Submitting to Christ!! NOTE: This only applies to converted baptized women who have accepted Christ as their savior and in baptism put to death the things that belong to their earthly, sinful self. As you love the Lord, you are willing to do whatever it is he asks you to do. A wife's love for Christ motivates her to submit in the same manner to her husband within reason. She looks in God's word and scripture. Applying biblical scripture plays a vital role in our obeying the Lord Christ. Ephesians 5:22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

John 14:21, "If you love Me, you will obey Me." A woman (wife) says, "Out of loving You, Lord, I am going to do what You have told me to do according to your laws." That is the motivation "as to the Lord." The New Testament elevated a God loving women to a position of honor, respect, and dignity. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. Ephesians 5:23 "And He put all things in subjection under His feet, and gave Him as head over all things to the church, which is His body, the fullness of Him who fills all in all." Ephesians 1:22-23 "...Christ is head over all things to the Church." The husband is the head of the wife, "But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every Man, and the man is the head of a Woman, and God is the head of Christ." 1 Corinthians 11:3.

1 Peter 3:7 "Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered." Men and women as marriage partners become equally divine, but there is a subordination of function; so too, man and woman are spiritually equal, but one ranks above the other in function. [In such a relationship both partners are pulling together towards a Godly Goal.]

When Paul says to the wife, "submit to your own husbands as unto the Lord," he means submission, not inferiority. Women are not in anyway inferior to the man," But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything." Ephesians 5:24.

A wife's submission is not a command that the husband can enforce. A husband should never use conniving, manipulation, brute force, mind-control, and other attempts to bring his wife into submission. Wifely submission is taught all through the Bible. "Let a woman quietly receive proper instruction with entire submissiveness. 12 But I do not allow a woman to teach (publicly correct/admonish) or exercise authority over a man, but to remain quiet." 1 Timothy 2:11-12. These verses give us the woman's role in the church. She is not to rule or overlord the men. "It was Adam who was first created, and then Eve. 14 And it was not Adam who was deceived, but the woman being quite deceived, fell into transgression." 1 Timothy 2:13-14. "For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; for indeed man was not created for the woman's sake, but woman for the man's sake." 1 Corinthians 11:8-9.

[The roles in marriage were ordained by God at creation. Specific duties are flexible and can be worked out in a marriage for the mutual good of the couple. But the role of the husband as head and the wife is fixed. Creation places man in a position of authority over the woman. Eve was made for the sake of Adam, to be his helper:] "18 Then the LORD God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.' 19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name. 20 And the man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. 21 So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh at that place. 22 And the LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. 23 And the man said, 'This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.' 24 For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh." Genesis 2:18-24.

For a man ought not to have his head covered, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. 1 Corinthians 11:7-8 Both men and women were created in God's image, but as Paul points out in, the original creation from the "dust of the ground" was Adam only. Eve was created later from part of Adam. It was not Adam who was deceived, but the woman being quite deceived, fell into transgression. 1 Timothy 2:14 ADAM stood by and allowed his wife Eve to be deceived and was ultimately the one responsible for what happened to mankind. Romans 5:12-21 places the blame on Adam; he followed his wife. Men, God created us to be the leaders. When we fail to do this and follow our wives instead, it causes numerous problems. But she does have the responsibility to remind you when you are out of character from God's laws. Eve needed protection, she needed a head. She acted independently without consulting Adam and was deceived and fell. She was breaking all ten commandments and Adam was with her and did not stop her.

Proverb 31:10-31 The submissive wife makes a choice to place herself as an equal underneath another equal, her husband, in order that there can be order and function in the family. If you want to have a properly functioning family, see Titus 2:1-15. It teaches us the role and conduct that God expects of both older and younger men and older and younger women.

Scripture makes it clear it is normally the man's responsibility to lead, and the woman's responsibility is to submit. There were exceptions such as Deborah in the Bible, Phillips Daughters four Virgins who prophesied. Or at times when there is a young widow with children. In pseudo-Christian homes the woman is running the show and not submitting, she is leading. God has set male and female roles as defined in scripture for their good. When these roles are reversed, just like with Adam and Eve in their fall, it often results in the destruction of the man, and of the wife, as well as the entire family.

This does not mean that a husband must make every decision, but he is responsible for every decision made. If a husband and wife disagree on a certain course of action, whose decision should be followed? It is the husband's ultimate decision right or wrong and God holds him accountable? The final ultimate decisions as to the finances, church, schooling of the children are up to the husband. Women, how do you respond when your husband makes a decision that you disagree with? Even when wrong you submit because God will direct and correct and it will come clear when a husband made a wrong decision in time.

There needs to be respect and good open communication between a husband wife. If the wife is not clear she should ask for clarity, a rephrasing or a better understanding. A loving husband will take the time to communicate understanding. Many stresses and strains on family life today are precisely due to disagreeing or ignoring open communication with one another. HUSBANDS do need to hear objections and why, with reason and be willing to compromise or rethink a directive when it is valid to do so. The only times a woman does not submit to her husband is when it is in direct disobedience to God's laws and commandments. Then she take a stand to obey God first above her husband. [Common sense should dictate that a husband with mental illnesses should not be in control of the ruin of the family. For instance a husband who refuses to provide and uses drugs of various derivatives to escape responsibility and reality. 1 Timothy 5:8]

Whether our culture agrees with Scripture or not—the clear teaching is that wives are to be subject to their own husbands in everything "AS IN THE LORD." What about the husband and an unbelieving or not yet converted wife. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it. A loving husband is gentle and takes his time showing his wife with love and patience and kindness leading his wife to the Lord and God's laws and teachings, He never forces it but leads her guides her. He teaches her, not as a bully or demanding or forcing. God does NOT force any of us to obey him whom He calls, He leaves the choice up to us to accept and submit and obey or to reject and walk away. But if the Husband is content to dwell, not contentious, and loving to her, then she submits to him as long as his directives are not contrary to any of God's laws and commandments.

A husband or wife with an unconverted mate does all they can to help the unconverted mate to come to understand God and His laws. However if the unconverted continues to be bullheaded, divisive, disruptive, rebellious and contentious day in and day out, then you may have to let them go. You are NOT bound to them. You are free, and you set them free so you both can go on with the choices each has made. I Corinthians 7:10-16; Means the contentious husband or wife chose the world and repeatedly has refused to understand, submit to God's laws and makes excuses why they refuse to obey God and His laws. They blame and accuse and finding fault in others, but they are never wrong. Often these people have a Jezebel controlling spirit that is very deep and hard to overcome. Fighting such evil spirit takes a lot of divine prayer, fasting for days, meditation and anointing. Often even pastors and others of faith, unless very strong with the Holy Spirit, cannot drive it out; let alone a God loving wife or husband to such a person.

If the unbelieving departs, you are allowed to re-marry. If there is NO hope at all of any re-conciliation you are not bound by marriage vows. For instance, the ex-spouse has married another and is polluted as an adulator. As true believers you are free to take a wife or husband of your own faith taking time to make sure you both have the same spiritual goals and not make another mistake. Many people of faith, not understanding scripture, feel they can never remarry. Every effort of reconciliation should be done however there comes a point you have spiritual insight and let the other depart and move on to whatever God directs you. 1 Tim. 5:11-15 admonishes younger widows to marry and bear children. Especially younger women with children should re-marry someone who is of like-minded and of the same faith. Deut. 6:14; Deut. 7:3-4 & 2 Corinthians 6:14. Admonish us not to go against God's laws and marry outside your faith, nearly always leading to problems. If believer has done this and the unconverted is content to accept the believer's commitment to God first good, A converted spouse is then the spiritual leader of the family and the children are made holy sanctified until they are of an age to choose God or the world.